The Dark Before the Light

Question:

My life has fallen apart, my career is over. And now I am losing my faith too.

I used to believe so strongly, but now my thinking has changed. Was I deluded to think, that G-d would help me?
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Answer:

I feel for you, in what must be a huge test of your character. Your whole world has been shattered to pieces. Just to get up in the morning, and face the day, must take mammoth strength.

There is a name for your situation; the Kabbalists call it Ayin Baemtza - "transitional nothingness." Between any two states of being, lies an intermediary state, of non-being.

Like a seed, that becomes a tree, it must first decompose, nullify itself, and rot into oblivion. Just as it reaches the verge of complete nonexistence, it starts to sprout, and reinvents itself into a new being.

Only by losing its being, as a seed, and becoming nothing, can it then reach a new being, a much greater being, a tree.

It has to be this way. To truly reinvent oneself, there must be a true and complete break from the past, a real nothingness, to make room for the new self, to emerge.
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You are presently going through an Ayin Baemtza (nullified)stage in your life. The life that was, is gone; and the life that will be, is yet to blossom; but you are left in a big black hole, of confusion, pain, and darkness.

That is a very hard place to be, because even though this transitional nothingness, is just a temporary state, a step between two stages in life; for you, the nothingness is real.

It is hard - maybe impossible - for you to see, any bright future ahead.

So what can you do to survive the transitional nothingness? What will keep you going, until you transform, into the you of tomorrow?
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In your current state of nothingness, you need to hold on to something higher than yourself. Now, you need faith, not philosophy. Say to yourself:

"My life is in disarray, I don't know what's flying, I don't know what will be, but I am in G-d's hands. This is a process, that for whatever reason I must go through. And with G-d's help, I will get through it."
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When in an Ayin (empty) state, it is not the time to be changing belief systems, or making important life choices.

The ground you are standing on, is too unstable, for you to be able to think clearly. It would be sad - no, it would be tragic - if in your frustration, you made choices that you will later regret, but not be able to reverse.

Don't make permanent choices, for a temporary problem.
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My friend, I offer no solutions to your predicament, but I do offer you one piece of advice. Just hold on to G-d, He is the one thing, that even in your nothingness, you haven't lost.

You will get through this black hole, and your life grow even stronger than before. The seed is planted, have faith, and G-d willing, your new tomorrow, will blossom soon.